Funny Little Jesus Freaks

I just recieved some MORE amusing fan mail through Niteflirt. 

This little note of adoration from impotent retard reg123 read:

“I suggest you get a real job, you nasty little parasite. “

What a giggling streak that brought on!  I’m just wondering though…

Why is a practicing Baptist surfing the BADDEST of BITCHES on Niteflirt?

Date of Birth:
March 12, 1958
Age:
49
Location:
alabama
Occupation:
MD
displayname:
robertgrubbe
loginname:
reg123
Denomination(Baptist, Methodist, Catholic…):
baptist
Home Church:
First Baptist Church Oxford
Favorite Verse:
Isaiah 6:3, 8
Statement of Salvation:
I have eternal life through the atoning work of Jesus Christ upon the Cross

WHO OWNS YOUR STUPID ASSES EVERY TIME?!!!!!!!

Shout it out loud around the world maggots :

DG THE QUEEN BEE

RULES!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

pissypants EATS INK PENS

There’s this little pigfuck who’s been stalking Me all over the place….writing Me emails after emails, arranging Niteflirt calls for WEEKS that I’ve ignored, BEGGING for Me to use him, take ALL of his pitiful money and well….doing ANYTHING to get a crumb of the White Devil’s Divine Attention.

This little pigfuck is COMPLETELY obsessed with Me.  So much so, that after a weekend of a Tony Robbins seminar (that fuckwit promised his adopted mommy and daddy he’d go to so he could try to get a *grasp* on his pathetic existence as a useless moron), the little bitch ran straight back to the One who knows EXACTLY what he needs.  ABUSE. AND MORE ABUSE.

Sooooooooo, to make a long story about a boring boy short:

I made him scrawl DG on his fat little cheeks and I-D-I-O-T into his Neanderthalic forehead with ink pens until it was red and raw and chew up those creme bruBics for dessert.  YUMYUM!!! 

Then I made him piss his pants in the SAME Internet cafe the next night and walk around asking people there for a black marker since he was such a fucking twat and forgot one AGAIN. 

Oh yeah, and I had My one of My Gorgeous Girlfriends sit in on it too……..We were laughing our heads off at this fuck for brains!!!

I’ve got like 20 screenshots of the hilarity that I’m gonna post on My site soon enough….but in the meantime here are some highlights:

That last shot is really My favorite, although I gotta say….the blue tongue on pissypants is HILARIOUS TOO!!!!!

Oh, and don’t even think that because I’ve displayed My Yahoo chat ID here that it implies you can message Me. 
Runts like YOU are to BUY My chat IDs HERE. 

I will IMMEDIATELY block you if you even TRY to message Me without doing so.  Yes, even with your pathetic little money and gift waving tactics.

I DON’T NEED YOU – you NEED ME.  Remember that and we’ll get on just fine……….

That is of course if you can withstand My DEMANDS and My COMMANDS…..HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cute Things

If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is, “God is crying.” 

And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is, “Probably because of something you did.

I Had No Idea…

…..how many of you fuckers lived in Chicago! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

You’d think that you would of spoken up when I was actually VISITING Chicago…….but I guess it takes someone threatening the Woman of your dreams to make you speak up.

It never ceases to amaze me how you piggies offer yourselves up for slaughter….

Someone’s got to burn the bacon, right?

Threats

There was a veiled little threat issued My way by another “internet domme” awhile back that I’m sure was thought to go unnoticed by little ol’; Me.  There were also some cute little staged recordings that attempted to disrespect Me and Mine.

I don’t usually pay attention to ANY of that ridiculous horseshit……….but…….

This is what I have to say:

The next time your MAN (ya know, the one who guides your little ass?) decides he’s gonna hack his way in……..you better inform the little fucker not to leave a trail. 

The day you fucking disrespect Me again – is the day you find yourself in the same motherfucking predicament you pretend to enjoy putting others in – ONLY WORSE.

The ONLY reason I’m not revealing your skanky little ass (and your family, and his family and ALL of your lies AND THE REASON WHY YOU CAN FIND OUT SO MUCH INFO ON PEOPLE) to the fucking world on My journal, is that I’d rather see you quiver in fear for awhile, because posting it on a fucking diary will be the LEAST of bonnie and clyde’s fucking worries after one phone call to the proper authorities.

David is armed and ready, cunt.

I COMMAND, I GET – $7,000 SHOPPING SPREE!!!

I’ve got the mustang so tied up in the brain and twisted around My little pinky!!!!!!!!!!  I’ve had him on a shopping-for-Goddess trip all week long and I kept him awake ALL last night and made him buy EVERYTHING last thing off My expensive “ponyboy-only” WANTlist!!!!!!

I also forced him strip naked outside of the house where his soon-to-be ex-wife was sleeping and do whacko nudie jumping jacks and like 60 old-fart pushups – each time he went down, he HAD TO KISS MY GROUND.  Then he got the privilege to run back inside and buy something else for Me……

Soooooooo……….although I don’t usually write about My scores until they come in – I’m just too excited not too!!!

The Queen Bee Of The Universe is getting:

Bose Lifestyle 28 Series III CD and DVD Player Surround Sound System – $1,999.00 (probably more $$$ with shipping, taxes, and installation!)

32″ Class BRAVIA® XBR-series LCD Flat Panel HDTV  – $1,599.00 (and a $249.00 5-year service plan)

Fender Artist Series Eric Clapton Stratocaster Guitar – $1,499.00

New boots (two pair that already came in!), more jewelry, software……and LOADS of other stuff I WANT!!!

My little broken mustang is so obedient, so fucked and soooooooooooooooo MINE!  A very good boy for Master………especially when the little shit leaves his (ex) wife as I have COMMANDED.

Oh and here are two KTV purses that ponyboy bought  – I really only wanted the black one, but My exceptionally good little fucker thought I might one another in pink!  Thoughtful, no?

Oh fuckers………..if you only knew what was inside this already! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!

Pink chrome……..it’s a little “ghetto-fabulous” but I can work anything into what I want =P

AND, here are the new boots that he just got – this little pony knows his Master does NOT like to wait and orders most everything with overnight and/or expedited shipping!

These are so gypsy!  I love embroidered leather boots!!!!!

AND THESE HAVE ALREADY KNOCKED MY OTHER FAVE “GIRLS” out of the #1 spot in My black icy Heart!  I FUCKING ADOOOOOOOOOOOORE these Doc Martens!!!!!!!  These are ball-smashing, envy-inspiring, cutesy bitch boots in pink and I ABSOLUTELY LOOOOOOOOVE THEM!!!

I’ve STILL got a whole LIST of cashola and humilation and suppressing of pigboys that’s gone on lately that I should write about…… but as they say………..

Good girls keep diaries, and BAD GIRLS just don’t have the time!

Good Girls Go To Heaven, BAD GIRLS GET LOADS OF $$$ AND GIFTS!!!

Hey fuckbutts….

Finally got a chance to take pictures of some of My newest presents and OOOOOOHHHHHH I got some FABULOUS stuff!

My new LG enV cell phone!  It’s THEE COOLEST phone ever!  And did I make the mustang just buy the phone??  Heeeeeeeeeeeeeelllllllll NO!  ponyboy’s paying a 2 year service contract every month too!  I do hope he got unlimited text messaging on it, or he’s gonna be paying out the kazoo!!

It’s internet ready, plays music, shoots pics and long videos AND flips open like a little computer so I can type with ease - IT’S SOOOOOOO COOL!!  I LOVE IT!

Uuuuuuuuuhhhhnnnnnnnn………..I fucking love these leather boots so much!!  They smell amazing and are BADASS!!!  ponyboy loves to buy his Master the boots She loves – no matter the cost =)

Now THESE are simply THEE most DIVINE pair of leather boots I have EVER owned!  They are so soft and so powerful at the same time!  Sexy as hell and just look KILLUH on My stems!  You’ll be seeing them soon enough in a photoshoot or 5.  These are My new girls – a term of affection I use for My current FAVE footwear!  Courtesy o’ the ’stang.

Some more musical/recording schtuff mustang got Me.  I really wanted those little strap buttons for My new guitars….they only came with one peg for a guitar strap - I was uber-pissed!

HUGE jewelry score from Eve’s Addiction.  I AM EVE. 

Cherries!!!  I really wanted some sparkly cherry jewelry – ponybaby obeys.

I found this jeweled line of home decor and trinkets by Collette Et Cie and had tiny get them for Me. They are soooooooooo beautiful and ornate! 

A jewelry box and earring display…….SOOOOOOO PRETTY!!

And then that tiny little coal lump went and surprised Me with a REALLY awesome gift….
I’m a Dragon in Chinese Astrology and this is a very, very excellent way to have a portrait of Myself in My home.  PERFECT =)

Cashola list later – you freakbabies are swarming the Queen.

Outing Bitches IS GOOD FOR THE SOUL!

While I understand that the cuntbags of the Universe (note: that means you, pigboys) are attracted to the flame that burns the brightest (MOI) – I don’t tolerate the bullshit below.

1. If you can’t serve financially – you’re MORE WORTHLESS to Me than I already view you.
2. DON’T EVER contact Me if your shitself is serving someone else.
3. I’d love to read the headline tomorrow: FREAKY GERMAN PRIEST HANGS HIMSELF IN CHURCH

A Tasty Treat

Eat it up babies…

Line Up Bitches!

I’m available from here on out tonight to take your stupid phone calls, little cuntbags.

BE WARNED – I’m in a terrible mood because I hurt My foot yesterday and am feeling super vicious.

SOMEONE is going to PAY for MY pain.

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